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It has been a couple of weeks since I have actually written a blog post. I have truly been in a negative funk and haven’t quite figured out how to get out of it or IF I can get out of it. Yes, I have lots of mental health books, pins, quotes to focus on and reflect but for some reason, nothing has helped me…not even coloring! Now, that is something that usually calms me but its not working! I have been working on this blog for three years. While I have tried my best to remain positive and have seen a slow but steady increase in followers and subscribers, I have fallen ill to the frustrations of not being successful. In business, they say it will take at least three years to break even when it comes to the financials. As I approach that milestone, I have not been able to recoup the money spent in this three year process. While I try to remain positive, I feel the downward spiral. Why must all good things come to an end? I welcome any suggestions as I lay out my struggles.
Social Distancing from a Kids Perspective
If you have followed me since this pandemic literally started in mid-March, then you know I have had a weekly ‘voicecast’ called Social Distancing from a Kids Perspective. I even dedicated a full web page to it! Each week we have a short 10-15 minute conversation about their world during this pandemic and what they really think, do or not do. We have a lot of fun with it! However, a couple of weeks ago, things just haven’t connected with it. My nephews are going through some trying times lately. I am not going to get into specifics, but I believe it is affecting them and as a result, the excitement of recording is lacking. In addition, my excitement is lacking because what they are going through as well. So, we haven’t recorded in a couple of weeks and when we are together in the next couple of days, we most likely will be recording our final segment – week #20. As I write this, I am crying inside. However, based on the circumstance, this is where it fits the category, good things come to a stupid end.
In 2017, while working in the corporate world, I was asked to move to another state for work. It was in my territory but my entire family is in New York so I turned it down and received a severance package. From that moment on, I was determined to do HR consulting. Read about it here. After being off of work for a couple of months, I landed an awesome consulting opportunity that I loved! In fact, I was spoiled with the flexibility, hourly rate, as well as the great people I was working with. That gig ended mid-2019 and I have been unable to secure an opportunity since. My focus remained positive though despite having no income as I was now able to focus on my blog site full time! I thought that would be the start of something truly awesome. It hasn’t been what I expected. Have I done enough? Is this good thing coming to a stupid end?
Third time is a charm right? Not so fast. My fellow blog site owners will understand this piece. When you have a website, you can place ads on it to generate income. You can also add links to social media posts, blog posts, etc. in order to generate income and there are so many affiliates out there to choose from.
Applying to be an Amazon affiliate is easy and I was accepted immediately. However, I find it very difficult to get any clicks and orders of anything. I point back to my human resources niche and because that is so specific, it hinders the progress?
So, have I generated income from Amazon? HA! If you thing a total of $2.00 is a real income, then yes. However, I have been cancelled by Amazon twice now for not meeting requirements and I am currently half way through my third cycle. Since it is so easy to become an affiliate, I keep on with it. However, it still is frustrating to get those emails that say something like…you have yet to meet the requirement to continue being an amazon affiliate and have the next 90 days to do so. It makes me sad and if the third time does not work, this ‘good’ thing will come to an end.
This one is different from Amazon. I applied and was accepted quickly. However, you have to apply to programs within the CJ family if you will. I choose brands that I love, buy from and are loosely related to my lifestyle/HR blog. Most of them turned me down. However, those that did not, I happily display on my site. I have generated nothing here at all. This was more promising to me because of the options and connections I felt to the products and services. However, this process is way too much work to put in for nothing.
My experience so far is that being a direct affiliate is the way to go. I have been more impressed with my flexjobs affiliation and have at least crossed the $30 mark this year. It is better, but obviously not where I need to be. I am also a partner with BambooHR and a couple of others. Here are my current affiliates in the event they spark your interest:
I started with bluehost 3 years ago and just renewed for another 3 years! Very happy with the service!
Let’s Look at the Positives
I suppose there are some positives and perhaps I can build on those. It feels like I always have a positive lurking but they are not followed up with rewards, which makes me feel like this is all just for fun. While it is fun, income is of most importance right now. I don’t want the good things to come to an end. So, do we have some positives?
During quarantine, I have been working on a project with a fellow consultant. We have worked together in the past on several occasions. This project has real opportunity to streamline the recruitment selection process for small to medium sized businesses. When companies start hiring again, there will be so many candidates to choose from! Who wants to waste their time going through an abundance of resumes only to finely decide on a candidate that doesn’t really fit the job or the culture and leads to turnover, wasted time and money? We did a live webinar (now recorded) on the 6 Steps to a Modern Digital Selection Process. Hopefully this will be the jump start needed for my HR consultant project hub!
My husband and I finally had a meeting with a financial advisor of sorts. Not sure the timing was best but it has taken me literally years to finally contact someone. Why? Well, because I have trust issues…seriously. Our first meeting went really well overall. However, for me it really magnified the fact that I have had no income in the past 14 months and now I am feeling guilt, more pressure than normal, and fear. The strange thing is that this individual actually helped me 10 years ago with an annuity and for some reason, I never thought to reach out to him afterwards. It took receiving something in the mail that I had questions about and it was like whoa – a light bulb went on. I should have called him years ago! Our second meeting is soon and I am really nervous about this one. We will learn if we are on the right track to retire when we want…without me earning income, this doesn’t feel like it will be a good meeting. However, the meeting did happen and that in itself is a positive – finally!
While these last few weeks I have literally spent less time on my website than ever, this week I am taking a FREE 5-day Chart Your Course Challenge. This is to learn how to build an online learning course/webinar/etc. During the past year or so, I have been brainstorming ways to enhance my site, social media, and income. As an HR professional, I have a pretty good handle on how to develop relationships with employees and management. In addition, there is a right way, wrong way, and the best way to terminate an employee. While a very touchy and difficult task, I have done it so many times in my career that I have actually been thanked by employees for the way I handled theirs. So, I have an idea to create 1 hour webinars on various subjects that cannot be learned without having the experience doing so. That is why I am taking this course. Hopefully it will steer me in the right direction! Every wonder how to put the human back in human resources? How about as an HR professional how to change the perception our department has? Hmmmm…this might interest some!
Secondly, I have been having podcast vibes for some time. I have been so busy trying to come up with ideas for blog posts, managing my social media accounts, and trying to keep up with maintenance of the website that I have not had the time to devote to…yet. I have a couple of episodes amateurishly recorded but haven’t generated them as real episodes with music and introductions yet. And, you can’t start a podcast without having at least 10 episodes recorded and guests and ideas lined up for the future. I am not there yet.
Feel free to pin either image below!
So, I am not sure I answered my own question or not. Why must good things come to a stupid end? The past two weeks have been depressing and negative for me. It feels like everything I have worked so hard for is falling apart. Everything I have done to take back my mental health and happiness has been failing and as a result I am falling deeper into a dark hole it feels like I cannot get out of.
Perhaps good things end because they really aren’t good things? Maybe it is because you need to reinvent yourself. Could it be to make room for the new and improved or up and coming? My mind wants to go back to being more positive than negative but I need something positive and different to help change my psyche. Why do you think good things end?
all the best….judean
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